I remember standing on The Kop at the final game of the 1988/89 season. It was THAT game against Arsenal. You know. The one where we could lose by one goal and still win the title. It was also the game that followed the match at Wembley where we had beaten Everton in the post Hillsborough Cup Final.
That day in the capital had been such an emotional day. The trip down there on a Merseybus double decker. Blue and Red mixed in a cocktail of football support. High spirits and respect for the occasion in equal measure. The game was a fitting tribute to the 96 souls lost in Sheffield. Liverpool always with the advantage but Everton certainly not there to make up the numbers.
I think that the gods had decreed that we would win the FA Cup in 1989 after that fateful April day. The players wanted to win it for the fallen and their families. And they did just that. After weeks of paying respects at funeral after funeral, the staff at Liverpool did for the Families the one thing that meant the most. Lifted a trophy, no, lifted THE trophy that mattered to their fans that year.
And then there was Arsenal. The players had given their all in the Cup Final and didn't have a lot left in the tank. Arsenal had it all to play for. It had been 18 years since their last league triumph. But we could be the first team to win the FA Cup and League double (you know like we should have done the year before against Wimbledon).
I don't remember that much about the game itself. I just remember feeling that we were defending to deep and weren't creating anything of note for ourselves. When we were one nil down I remember shouting in frustration something along the lines of "Do you think that the victims would want you to give up on the league?" I think I knew then that although we were still in the box seat, we weren't likely to stay there for much longer. The Michael Thomas goal was at the other end of the ground and by this time I was stood near the front of The Kop with my head not that much above the level of the playing surface. It was one of those moments that happen in slow motion. The chip over Brucie, the rolling over, the fit like goal celebrations. I remember slumping to the ground, knowing that we didn't really have time to come back from this body blow and hearing the final whistle blow.
I composed myself enough to stay for the trophy presentation and stayed to congratulate the new champions. I was devastated but still needed to show my appreciation.
Funnily enough, these memories came back to me today, not only because we are moving into the week of the Hillsborough anniversary, but also because in football terms, I feel that we have reached a turning point. Liverpool have only won the title once since that game against the Gunners, the following year in 1990. Last week, I blogged that my faith had been sorely tested. Today, after a goalless draw at home against Fulham, my hope seems to have deserted me as well.
Of course we can still win silverware this season and I will celebrate winning the Europa League like any other trophy, if it happens.
But the future is not good for Liverpool. Unless there is an almighty turnaround, we will not be dining at Europe's top table next season, and although that is a real problem financially, I am more disappointed about not being able to play the Barcelona's and Inter's of this world. But more worryingly is our prospects for the Premier League next season. After being kidded that this was our year I now go into the new season with trepidation, before this one has even finished.
Why do I feel like this? Well the obvious reason is that Liverpool is currently owned by businessmen rather than sports fans. I accept that nowadays that football clubs (not teams as news channels insist on calling them) either need a sugar daddy or a businessman at the helm, but it has to be someone who understands that success on the field is the one thing that will make everything alright either for the owner, or for the fans willingness to put their money into the owners pockets.
We know that The Muppets don't ever keep their promises so nothing that they do now will surprise me. However, this week, Rafa has surprised me. He has admitting making mistakes. It;'s interesting in that most supporters already knew he had made mistakes, although there were usually understandable reasons for those mistakes, they were often chances that weren't worth taking (or alternatively chances that were worth taking that haven't been taken). That's what Rafa gets paid for. To make those big decisions. He's never shied away from them. When he came to Liverpool, I was genuinely excited as his record with Valencia in breaking the Barca/Real hold on La Liga filled my heart with hope. Now I fear he is getting to many of the big decisions wrong. I don't mean the day to day ones like team selection and substitutions. He works with the players over the week and sees more than we ever could and we need to trust his professional judgement in that respect. But I'm just not convinced that he can take us any further with the shackles that he has to wear. And to take it one step on, i am not sure that he can take us any further even if those shackles are removed. I would question his transfer dealings when he does have money to spend. Granted he has brought us Torres, Reina, Mascherano and Alonso, but he has also brought in Nunez, Josemi, Dossena, Kromkamp and Voronin. All in all I would suggest as many negative signings as positive ones.But my real beef with his transfer policy is highlighted by the summer moves. Liverpool had just finished second in the league and confidence was high. Alonso wanted to move to real Madrid and Rafa wanted to get the best deal for Liverpool. However, by protracting the discussions, he got a few more pennies for the coffers, but he also gave himself a lot less time to spend it. Robbie Keane had been sold in January and that meant that the only cover for Fernando Torres was the inexperience of David N'Gog or playing Dirk Kuyt in the position he was actually bought for. So we needed a replacement for Alonso and cover up front. Who did we get? Well to replace Xabi along came Albert Aquilani. He may not have been a direct, like for like replacement for the Spanish play maker but after working with the team in pre season he would soon show how he could fit in to the team. Except of course, he couldn't. He was crocked from the word go, and wasn't likely to recover for a couple of months at least. By which time, either the team would have settled into a playing pattern that Aquilani would have had to fit into, rather than be built around, or we would need to be changing our way of playing mid season because it just wasn't working (in my opinion, rafa was actually caught between the devil and the deep blue sea in this case as when Aquilani was eventually available, all be it belatedly, we did need to change fairly drastically but Rafa chose not to take that option). And who did Rafa choose to sign to cover El Nino? Well actually he decided it was more important to spend a significant sum of money on buying an attacking right back and letting an attacking right back leave to join Xabi at The Bernabau. OK, Johnson might be an improvement on Arbeloa, but is he really more than £10 million worth of improvement? Was Arbeloa that poor? I'm not convinced.
Not only do i feel that Rafa got the transfers wrong at the start of the season, I also feel he got the tactics wrong as well. We finished last season playing attacking football and going all out to win. That was the foootball that took us so close to the title. We have seen a more cautious approach right from the off this season. This is my prime reason for thinking that Rafa has taken us as far as he can. He is by instinct a cautious, safety first type manager. Getting defence is important, but it is important to score more goals than yoru opponents. that's simply how you win games, and to do that you need to attack. Not necessarily in a gung ho fashion, but certainly the emphasis should be on beating opponents rather than avoiding defeat. We have been vulnerable to late goals this season, whereas the season before we were always likely to score and sneak wins in the closing stages of matches.
I think that season 2008/09 was Rafa's "Out of Character" season. I feel that this season he has reverted to type, and this is why I think that he has taken Liverpool as far as he can go.
I thank you Mr Benitez for Istanbul. I thank you for winning the FA Cup. I thank you for Pepe and El Nino. I thank you for the excitement that you gave me last season. I hope I can also thank you for winningthe Europa League this season. Good luck in whatever you do in the future. It's now time for someone else to take up the good fight.
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