What's another year?

This time last year I felt I needed to write about my Hillsborough experiences. You can find that post at http://strommy.blogspot.com/2009/04/it-was-20-years-ago-today.html.

I felt that I needed to write that for a number of reasons. Firstly, I don't think I had ever talked properly to anyone about what I had gone through at that time, how I had felt, what I had witnessed. I was there with my dad, but we'd never actually talked about it. How can you? I love my dad dearly but talking about it just seemed pointless. We'd both been there, seen and done the same things, what could we say to each other.

I couldn't talk to my friends because I didn't want to hear anything back in return. I just wanted to talk, and yet I didn't want to talk all at the same time. 20 years later, I was ready to pour my heart out to the anonymity of cyberspace, knowing that anyone who wanted to,friends, family, fellow supporters, strangers, could read if they wanted. I did get some responses back from various sources and that made me feel as though a weight had been lifted from my shoulders and I thank anyone and everyone who read that post for helping me, even if you didn't know you were doing it.

The other main reason I wrote the blog last year was that I was still angry with the authorities for the lack of justice that the victims families had received. I was one of the 30,000 people who made their way to Anfield on April 15th 2009. I had to pick my brother up who had finished work quite late so we were running late and I was quite concerned about where we could park. Thanks to Everton FC who allowed us to park in their club car park for the event.

As we walked over Stanley Park with 20 minutes to spare, I could tell by the numbers, that the day was a special day. We arrived at Anfield and straight away knew that there was no way we would get seats in the Kop. Eventually we got seats in the Main Stand almost level with the Anfield Road end penalty spot. And the people just kept on coming. The Main Stand filled, the lower Anfield Road stand filled, The upper Anfield Road Stand started to fill. It was amazing.

Families with very young children who respected the solemnity of the occasion, a perfectly observed two minutes silence, the reading of all the victims names, the vast array of different football teams shirts that were represented in addition to Liverpool, Everton and Tranmere. All memories that stick.

Then there was a pivotal point. It is one I have discussed with my uncle. My uncle took me to my very first senior game at Anfield on 1st January 1976. Since then I have loved talking football with him. he is one of the keenest Liverpool fans that you could ever meet, but he always manages to find the alternative point of view. Discussing what happened oat the memorial service with him, I feared he might have had a point.

The government minister with responsibility for Culture Media and Sport 12 months ago was Andy Burnham, who later became Health Secretary. Mr Burnham was not only a keen football fan, but also an Evertonian, so understood the emotions that were going to be on display at Anfield that day. Part way through his speech, there was a groundswell of emotion. A small chant turned into a tidal wave of sound. Almost the whole ground was singing "Justice for the 96". There were a few dissenting voices, including Trevor Hicks, saying we should respect that the government had sent a representative etc. This was a discussion I had with my uncle in the middle of Morrisons a week or so later.

Fair play to the man. He was there and he probably expected some form of justice protest. However, did he expect 30,000 people to attend and for the vast majority to take part in that protest.

The Hillsborough Memorial Service always gets a mention on the local, and depending on the other stories, national news. Last year, because of both the vast numbers that turned up and the protest against the government, it received prominent coverage.

So how do I feel twelve months on. I certainly feel less bottled up than I did on the 20th anniversary and I also feel slightly less angry. In the last year, an independent panel has been set up to review all of the documents relating to Hillsborough that should have been kept locked up for another ten years. I believe that this panel has been set up in response to the show of emotion displayed at Anfield 365 days ago. We have had reviews, enquiries and inquests before and although Lord Justice Taylor's official enquiry put the blame fairly and squarely at the door of the organising authorities (South Yorkshire Police, the FA etc) there are still too many families that don't know, officially, how their son, daughter, brother, sister, father, or uncle died that day.

The coroner, who, in a master stroke of casting for the Jimmy McGovern TV play about the disaster, was played by Ian McDiarmid who also played the Emperor in the Star Wars films, decided that all the victims had received their fatal injuries before 3.15 on the fateful day. This meant that any evidence that related to later than that cut off time was not admissible to the jury. So evidence e that there were some victims, talking to rescue workers, even asking for their mum, at around 4 o'clock could not be presented.

Hopefully, the new independent panel will be able to uncover the information that will finally provide justice for the families. I have high hopes for this panel. One of the members is Professor Phil Scraton, who, if you didn't know, wrote the book "Hillsborough. The Truth" which is the most considered work on the subject. with him on the panel I for one believe that there will not be any whitewash, coverup or hiding of the truth.

Of course, this date every year brings sad memories and puts me in mind of the victims of the disaster. The 96 who died from the physical injuries they received that day, the countless others that have suffered with physical and mental scars since then, and of course the relatives and friends who still await final closure on the events in Sheffield.

Rest in Piece to the 96. You'll Never Walk Alone.